


losing battle

by foolishclown



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Dave | Technoblade and Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Suicide Attempt, Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, please give tommy a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:28:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27822277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foolishclown/pseuds/foolishclown
Summary: Tommy took a few steps towards the couch, out of the kitchen. He was in his old house, his dads house. Phil wasn’t home, of course, he didn’t even know where he was anymore.He stood there for a moment, waiting. He could stop this now. He could throw up, he could call someone.But he wanted this.
Relationships: Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit
Comments: 24
Kudos: 564





	losing battle

**Author's Note:**

> TW for suicide of a main character/minor, graphically describes it and how he does it

Tommy gripped the small bottle, hands shaking as he stood. He had been standing like this for nearly 30 minutes, unable to make up his mind. 

About sixty pills waited for him in the bottom of the clear bottle, taunting him. Just do it already. _Just do it._

Something in him switched, a sudden drive of determination as he poured as many pills as he could fit into his mouth, choking them down with what little water he had. 

Okay. That was nearly half. He only had to do it one more time, and it was done. It would be over. No going back. 

His body filled with fear, begging him to stop. He knew he should stop, he should stop before it was too late. But he couldn’t, he couldn’t keep this up, he couldn’t. Thoughts of Wilbur swam in his head, the crazed look of a broken man, a familiar look in his eyes. Tommy saw that in the mirror nowadays. He wondered if Wilbur had ever been in this situation. 

He thought of Techno, monotone as ever, asking him if he was okay. The way he saw intense worry in his brother, his actions gentle and concerned, awkward and genuine. That had been weeks ago, but Tommy thought about it every day since. 

The rest of the pills went down his throat. He placed the bottle down, taking in his situation. 

He felt a knot form in his stomach, his throat beginning to close up. He shook violently, not even realizing that he was crying until now. This can’t be happening. It couldn’t be happening. Did he make the right choice?

Tommy took a few steps towards the couch, out of the kitchen. He was in his old house, his dads house. Phil wasn’t home, of course, he didn’t even know where he was anymore. 

He stood there for a moment, waiting. He could stop this now. He could throw up, he could call someone. 

But he wanted this. 

At least, he was pretty sure he did. He scolded himself for being so indecisive. This isn’t a good fucking time to be unsure, idiot. 

Minutes past, his thoughts racing faster, memories and scenarios rushing through his head, holding onto the couch for leverage. Had it been 30 minutes? It could have been longer. 

Tommy felt his breathing slow, his thoughts slowing down with it and becoming fuzzy and disconnected from him. His grip on the couch loosened, his body suddenly frail and unsteady. He desperately wanted to lie down and sleep, stumbling his way to the couch and falling onto it, his head hitting it with a muted _thump_. His chest began to ache, his skin felt freezing cold and burning hot at the same time.

He stared at his own hand, distantly alarmed to see that his fingers were blue. Nothing was making sense. He wanted Wilbur, wanted Phil, even Techno would help. More time passed, his eyes drooping as he tried to keep himself awake, unsure of where he even was anymore. 

His shaking was still present, but it didn’t bother him. He let out a laugh. Why was it funny to him? The whole situation was just hilarious, his laughs quiet and deluded. 

God, why did his chest hurt so damn bad? He could barely feel his own breathing, light and slow, his chest barely rising with each inhale. Whatever, he thought to himself, blurred and far away thoughts relaxing him. He was just so sleepy. 

Tommy didn’t even know he had closed his eyes, his grip on reality completely gone as he drifted into unconsciousness. His last coherent thought was of his family. He wished he had told them. 

A hand shook him. “Tommy! Tommy? Wake up!” 

Wilbur’s voice rang through his ears. Tommy opened his eyes, the room fuzzy and disorienting, like it was shifting. 

“Tommy? What’s going on, what’s wrong with you?” Wilbur sounded panicked, his voice shaky. Did Tommy really look that bad?

“Willlll... it’s nothin’, ‘s ok... just sleepy, that’s all...” Tommy tried to sit up to prove his point, falling back down immediately. 

“Tommy, tell me what’s going on. Are you hurt? Are you drunk or something?” 

Tommy laughed, putting a hand over his chest. “Nooo, stupid... ‘m not drunk, took pills.” 

Wilbur’s face fell. “What pills?” 

Tommy shrugged. “Pills,” he offered, honestly unable to remember what they were anymore. 

Wilbur frantically ran to the kitchen, looking around for evidence. His eyes landed on an empty prescription bottle, snatching it up and staring intently. It was one of Phil’s prescriptions, the one he got for Techno’s chronic pain when they were younger. Wilbur panicked. Expired, strong painkillers, and the bottle had been nearly full. 

Tommy blinked as the blurry image of his brother returned, a strong hand snatching him up off the couch, picking him up and carrying him like a child. 

“Will-Will, what are you doing...?” 

“Taking you to get help, now.” Wilbur’s breathing was rapid, genuine terror rushing through him. He couldn’t believe this was happening. He had no idea Tommy had even considered something like this, how the hell did he not notice? 

“W-what? No, no, Wilbur- please, no, no, let me down-“ Tommy weakly wiggled against Wilbur, trying to push off of him to no avail. Wilbur just tightened his hold on the smaller boy. 

“No,” he commanded, already far from the house, making a beeline for the hospital, “why would you do this, Tommy? I don’t understand, what happened?” 

Tommy clawed at Wilbur, trying to make his brother release him. “E-everything, Wil, everything- T-Tubbo doesn’t need me now, dad is gone, Techno won’t talk to me, you’ve lost your mind, Schlatt is still in power, I can’t do-can’t do anything anymore, I-“ His voice was weak, his vision still blurry, heart rate slowing even more. 

Nothing was adding up to Tommy, how did he get here? It was like every time he blinked he sank further into the ground, his body numb and aching as he was swallowed whole by the earth.

“I’m so sorry, Tommy.” Was all Wilbur said, a hand rubbing circles into his back as he ran, picking up the pace as Tommy started to go limp in his arms. 

“It’s okay, Wil.” 

His brother’s breathing slowed, his hands sliding down and going completely still, landing at his side. Wilbur frantically tried to wake him again, failing. 

Tommy finally looked peaceful. 

**Author's Note:**

> i am so sorry about this
> 
> please comment if u liked it i crave validation more than air


End file.
